Family is probably the oddest invention God ever made.
Okay, maybe that’s a little overboard, but think about it. You live for roughly 18 years with a group of people you are genetically connected to, but otherwise have no idea who they are. And, I suppose, you spend that time finding out just that. Though there are people who live their who lives never truly knowing their family. They take the bonds they were born with for granted because, well, they were born with them. Nothing was earned or sought after, therefore, there is no chase. Unless of course, you live in the real world and have things befall your family that either mold all of you or cause you to scatter.
Like I said, Families are odd.
They can be the cause of the worst and best things that happen to you.
They can cause you the worst pain and heartache, and the greatest joy and love.
They are the roommates you never picked, and the best friends you should have, if you let them.
Honestly, they can be the absolutely worst things in your life. They can cause you to care so much that your heart wishes to follow them everywhere they go, and then they will rip it out and run with it as they push you away. I suppose this part, for me, is mainly my brother. Perhaps for you it is someone else, or was someone else, or maybe even will be.
The truth about families is that they will at some point, no matter what you do or what precautions you took or how much you cared inside, break your heart. But, if you tune in long enough, they will come back to pick up the pieces.
I can’t tell you that I speak from experience. I can’t tell you a heart-wrenching story about the “prodigal son” in my life. But what I can say is that I felt something tonight, when I was alone, angry and ready to give up. I felt God telling me to cling tighter, to keep loving and trying, that it will come. He said I was made this way–with a sensitive, caring, sometimes over-dramatic self–for a purpose. I am “fearfully and wonderfully made” and I have a reason for the way I am. For such a time as this. To care, no matter what the cost. To see this through until the very end, and that no matter if this all turns around, or if I am left, caring with no one to care about me except for my heavenly Father, there will always be something far greater as my reward. Love is always the best choice, and I am choosing it. No matter if it takes 5 years or 50 or if nothing ever comes of it. I was made to care, and my family will be the first to receive.
“…these should learn first of all to put their religion into practice by caring for their own family and so repaying their parents and grandparents, for this is pleasing to God.” 1 Timothy 5:4
Love you all,